Week 5-YWAM experience
FAITH: Sometimes life doesn’t always work out the way we planned it too and that’s ok. I have come to find that in the end everything usually works out for the best! As I sit here trying to figure out what to write about this week I cannot help but think of all the plans I have made for my life that have failed. Some have been really big and some not so big. With the exception of one plan that still has yet to be fulfilled they all ended up working out for the best and I have no doubt the unfulfilled plan will as well.
This has been a rough week. On Friday I was denied the 60 more days I needed to stay in Brazil for the TIME I PLANNED TO STAY. I must give God praise for 30 more days at least! I went from deciding to go to Argentina to fix the problem, to contacting the US Embassy for help, to deciding to go to Paraguay, to contacting other mission’s organizations for help and on Monday I ended up having a melt down! I was so overwhelmed from fixing this problem on my own that I neglected to practice what I preached the week before in the last letter I wrote. After talking with a good friend, re-reading what I wrote last week, journaling and praying, I decided it just might be time for me to go home early. God has a purpose and a plan for my life that he will fulfill and I need to go along with it. I have faith that His plans will work out grand!
LOVE: This week (today actually) I am also leaving the Refuge House. Leaving this place is a lot harder than I anticipated it to be. Three weeks ago I couldn’t wait to get out of here with all the frustrations I was facing. Now I do not want to leave because I know those trials have taught me so much. I have also grown so attached to these children in such a short time. God has filled my cup with His love so much that it was overflowing and I couldn’t help but spill it out all over these children. I don’t think I have ever loved this much! The way I have loved these past 5 weeks has been different too; sort of a 1 Cor 13 kind of love. =)
WISDOM: 1 Corinthians 13 is a scripture that is well known as the Love Chapter. I have known it and had it memorized from the time I was a young child. That knowledge didn’t do me any good because I didn’t understand the meaning behind the verses and would often use it to prove my point. Now, after this past 5 weeks, I finally get the meaning behind it. Now I understand God’s love and how I am suppose to love.
The first 3 verses of the chapter talk about things we do in life that are meaningless if there is no love behind their motives. Example: 1 Cor 13:1 says, “If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal.” Boy does this wakeup call hurt! There have been so many times in my life where I just tell it the way I see it. While what I said may have had truth behind it, there was no love behind that truth to support it and therefore it was taken offensively. My motives for speaking the truth were arrogant, boastful, envious, and rude because I was irritable or resentful and wanted my way. How many friendships I have lost because of this? How many hearts I must have broken because of this? How many opportunities I must have missed because of this? GOD FORGIVE ME!
After the first 3 verses the rest of the passage goes on to speak about what love is. The first characteristic that is given to love in verse 4 is that “love is patient.” When love is patient it is wise. When love is patient it prays for God to reveal the truth to the person who has done wrong. When love is patient it waits for the person who has done wrong to ask for advice. When love is patient it easily forgives.
I know this will be an experience I will never forget. I have really had to learn the truth behind godly love. I’m so grateful that the Spirit has revealed these things to me and helped me understand them. It is this experience where I really grasped an understand for why psychology was the degree of study God placed on my heart when I decided to finish school 3 years ago. My eyes were so opened to how closely tied together missions and psychology are. I pray that God will constantly remind me of these life lesson’s I have learned and that I will continue to apply them to my life and not forget them the minute I come home.
Since I am leaving Brazil early (August 2), I will be unable to go on the Porto Seguro trip with my church which breaks my heart. This project is so special to me. I am praying for an opportunity to go before I have to leave with another group. I ask that you would join me in this prayer. Praise: that I have found contentment in the decision to go home early!
The transition to the new house I am going to today. Praise: My time at the Refuge hose has been so wonderful and I have learned so much.
Continued prayer for the children at the Refuge House, that they would know God as their Abba Father. I was able to share these evangelism bracelets with the colored beads with them Wednesday night and they really enjoyed hearing the story. Pray for those children who do not have a personal relationship with Jesus in the house.
Also that there would be a way to find a tutor for the boy I told you about that cannot read.
I have to write a paper on this experience for school since it was also part of my internship. Pray that God gives me the words to use and that I would do well on the paper since it is most of my grade for the class. Praise: With all I have been through this past 5 weeks I got a lot to write about!!!!! =)
Thank you all again for your support during this process! I have been so blessed by your prayers, encouragement, and love! May God bless you for the kindness you have shown to me!